i don't think i'm going to smoke weed anymore. i guess what i've noticed but i've been too ashamed or scared to admit is that, while it takes me away from my woes at the time, it generally brings me down. that week i smoked from morning to night, i would literally stay in my room and not eat for a day, then overeat the next, with the curtains drawn because the sunlight hurt my eyes and in my pajamas all day. now that i think about it, i don't know what the fuck i was thinking. all i know is that i never want to do that again in my life ever, ever ever ever. and i didn't want to admit it before at all but my month away has given me a sense of confidence to get back on my feet and do what i was set out to do. and that is study, become a professional, leave those childish things behind. so yeah.
bye bye marijuana. it's been painfully pleasurable knowing you.
This is the Day I know. Get better my darling. Hope to see you soon.
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